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THE SCIENTIST

The lab was a mess, even to the most charitable visitor. Unfinished projects littered every flat surface, especially the floor, with spare parts and equipment scattered about. Maintenance had refused to clean it until everything was put away.

The problem was, Dr. Vasily liked it that way. He had a jumpy mind and the jumble inspired him. He also knew where everything was and to put it all away would make his ideas neat, ordinary, and useless. It would also take a lot of boring work.

“Nobody’s inspired by a clean room,” he had told Maintenance.

But now he had run out of ideas for his latest project, an invisibility suit.

“I’m stuck,” he thought. “I need a change of scenery.”

Dr. Vasily was famous for inventing the Time Chamber, which allowed him to travel to different dimensions. He decided to visit the Fifth Dimension for a break. The Time Chamber was about the size of a closet. He opened the door, went in, and zapped himself to the Fifth Dimension. The darkness was just what he needed to concentrate.

“I’m hungry,” he thought after a while. “I bet there are brownies on Earth.”

That meant a choice: inspiration or brownies? Brownies won. His invisibility project could wait. He knew that if he didn’t get brownies soon, he would starve.

“Once I finish my invisibility suit,” he thought, “I can take all the treats I want and no one will know it’s me, but right now it’s time to go back.”

Dr. Vasily activated the Time Chamber, and with a bang, a flash, and a little smoke, he transported back to Earth.

“What was that noise?” yelled the cook. “We’ve told you before, no more explosions, especially in the house!”

She was going to have to search Stanley’s bedroom again. Who knew what he had in there?

“I hate that,” she thought, remembering the lizard under his bed.

“I need it in case any Sea-Monkeys escape,” Stanley had said.

The Sea-Monkeys had never hatched, but he had wanted to be ready if any got out of the aquarium.

“Time for a snack?” asked Mom when Stanley gave her a hug. She knew he was hungry when he did that.

She put a plate of double-chocolate peanut butter brownies in front of him with a glass of milk. She loved his smile.

“What are you doing in your room?” Mom asked. She rarely liked the answer.

“It’s a secret,” said Stanley.

“What good is an invisibility suit if everyone knows it?” he thought.

Suddenly, he had a breakthrough.

“Can I have a roll of aluminum foil?” he asked.

“It’s in the drawer,” said Mom. Aluminum foil didn’t sound too dangerous, but with Stanley she never knew.

The aluminum foil was perfect for his invisibility suit. He already had the other parts, a mirror and duct tape, in his lab.

After eating some more brownies, he returned to his lab and got to work.

“If I can reflect light off of me,” Dr. Vasily thought, “no one can see me.”

It took a while to wrap himself in the aluminum foil, using the duct tape to hold everything together. He made a foil hood to cover his head, and then he taped a mirror on his chest. If he was careful, he could move without tearing anything.

The last step was the transmogrifier, which allowed him to change himself into anything he wanted. It was disguised as a large cardboard box with a red construction paper dial on it. He wrote “invisibility” on the crowded dial, then climbed in. The transmogrifier hummed briefly and combined all the different pieces to make an invisibility suit. When he got out, he couldn’t see himself.

“It worked!” shouted Dr. Vasily.

“Inside voice,” yelled the cook, who was afraid to ask what worked. She never liked the answer.

Dr. Vasily walked carefully from his lab to the kitchen.

Mom saw Stanley creep by her covered in aluminum foil and lots of duct tape, with a mirror on his chest.

She didn’t need to ask what he was doing. Stanley had been talking about invisibility for at least a week. She got another cup of coffee, then sat at the kitchen table and watched him walk out the front door.

Mom knew where he was going. He always went down the street to show Annie his inventions. She called Annie’s mother to warn her.

“I think he’s supposed to be invisible,” said Mom. She could hear Joan sigh – Mom heard that a lot from people.

Dr. Vasily went to Annie’s lab. No one said anything to him along the way.

“They can’t see me,” he thought.

He rang Annie’s bell and her assistant opened the door.

“Who’s there?” said Joan. “I can’t see anyone.”

Dr. Vasily walked quietly past her and went to Annie’s lab.

“You’re covered in foil and tape,” said Annie. “What are you supposed to be?

“I’m invisible,” said Dr. Vasily.

“But I can see you,” she said.

“I turned off my invisibility suit,” he said.

“Turn it back on,” said Annie.

“I need to save power,” replied Dr. Vasily. “Isn’t it neat?”

“No,” she said. “You look like a stupid foil mummy with a mirror on you.”

“You’re just jealous,” he said. “What are you doing?”

“Reading. Leave me alone – I’m in time out again. My mom said you can’t stay.”

“OK,” said Dr. Vasily, who left her room and shut the door behind him.

“I’m invisible now,” he said through the door.

“No, you’re not,” said Annie.

Dr. Vasily walked slowly to the front door and left.

Joan didn’t say anything to him; she just sat at her desk and wondered again how Stanley’s parents put up with him.

“I’d have him do more chores,” she thought. “And I sure wouldn’t let him leave the house covered in aluminum foil.”

On his way back, Dr. Vasily walked past Mrs. Schmidt, who lived nearby. She used a cane and lived by herself. Stanley liked to visit her -- she kept a bowl of hard candy and had a friendly cat named Jake.

“Hello, Stanley,” she said.

“I’m invisible,” Dr. Vasily replied.

“Why, so you are dear,” she said. “Say hello to your parents and visit me when I can see you.”

“O.K.”

As silently as possible, he returned home and went to the kitchen. The cook was making something smelly for dinner. He went straight to the cookie jar to get some more brownies.

“The best part of being invisible,” he thought, as he lifted the lid.

It was empty. It had a new label: “invisibility jar.”

“Invisible brownies – the best kind!” he thought, as he groped around inside it, hoping to feel one, without success.

Dr. Vasily went back to his lab. He was tired of no one seeing him, so he carefully took off his invisibility suit, packed it in a bag, opened the door to the Time Chamber and sent it to the Fifth Dimension.

“If I wear it over there,” he thought, “maybe Overlord Vqrut won’t eat me.”

It was then that he noticed the signs. There was a new one on the Time Chamber’s entrance (“Caution: Radiation Area”) and another (“Laboratory of Dr. Vasily”) on his lab’s door.

“The engineer’s been busy,” he thought. “Maybe now Maintenance will leave me alone.”

“Dinner’s ready!” he heard the cook shout.

“There’ll be dessert,” he thought. “With a dinner that stinky, there’s always dessert. It better not be invisible.”

There was no dessert, but dinner tasted better than it smelled.

After eating, he went back to his lab. He needed a new project.

“Maybe Annie can help,” he thought. “I’ll call her tomorrow.”

He started to clean up the lab a little. Annie liked things neat, and maybe his Mom would bake some cookies. Tomorrow was going to be a good day.

* * * * * *

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