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[personal profile] rayaso
Topic: The Blue Hour

SECOND CHANCES

“It’s time to move along,” thought Mark Burton, “I’ll take down the tent tomorrow.” One more day in Kansas wouldn’t kill him.  The police had left him alone and customers had found him, but business had nearly stopped.

I need a new sign – hell, I need a new everything. The tent was old, his truck needed the transmission fixed, and his sign had led a previous life with a realtor before Mark had painted over it.  The peeling sign now read:
Fortunes Retold
See the Life-Changing Hourglass
Only $20
no guarantees, no refunds

The last part is the best.  It lets me keep their money when nothing happens. After putting the sign in the tent for the night, Mark took out his flask for a long swallow of inspiration.  I hate that hourglass!

It really was amazing, and Mark was its Keeper. I wonder how much I could get for it?  The jewel-encrusted gold frame alone would be worth a fortune, but what really made it special was the blue sand of crushed sapphires.  I wish I could sell it, but it’s just too dangerous, and only a Keeper should use it. He knew that it was very old, passing to each new Keeper.

People would hear about the hourglass and find his tent, looking sad and broken, just to put their money down, tell him their stories, and take their chances.

“When I was 22, I broke up with Roy just because Pa didn’t approve.  I never stopped loving him, and if only . . . .”

“I missed the death of my son because I had to close that deal.  I’d give anything to have said goodbye . . . .”

“I should have taken that other job . . . .”

They would all be mesmerized by the beauty of the hourglass when Mark put it on the table.   “I’m only a fortune reteller – it’s about your past choices, not the future,” he would say.  “This might work, but probably not, and I never know why.”  He would turn the hourglass over, and the sapphire sand would begin to run through it.

Mark had timed the hourglass many times, but it was always different.  Sometimes it would take two minutes, sometimes much longer.  No matter how long it would take, the client would always sit there, hopeful and eager, waiting silently.

Once the sand ran out, the disappointed clients would leave, still carrying their burdens, leaving their money behind.  But for a special few, the sapphire sand would reverse, and begin to run backwards, flowing up to the top chamber.

These clients would smile as their pain left them, and once all the sand reached the top, they would simply disappear, vanishing into nothing.

Mark had stopped being surprised by this long ago.  He didn’t know where they went or what happened to them, or why they were chosen.  He hoped that the lucky ones were sent back to fix their lives and become happy, but he didn’t know.

When he had first become Keeper, Mark had tried it for himself many times, but the sand would always flow quickly to the bottom and just stay there.  He had given up long ago.

Back at a nearby fleabag motel and deep into his fifth beer of the evening, Mark wondered again how he had come to this.

I think I was happy once.  I think I had a family – I wasn’t always a Keeper. Mark had fragments of dreams, visions of a different life, but his memories really began when he first appeared as a Keeper thirty years ago, in Arizona.

I wish I could have talked to another Keeper.  Mark’s first memory was being in this same tent, sitting at the same table, the hourglass in front of him, already knowing what it was, and that he was its Keeper.  When will my time finally be up?
* * * * * * * * * *
It was a hot summer day in Flagstaff, Arizona, and Jennie Burton was pushing her baby’s stroller out to the car.  “Hurry up,” she said to her husband, “Annie’s asleep and I want to keep her that way.”  Mark was always late.

“Just a minute,” Mark said, sharply.  He still hadn’t gotten over their earlier argument.

“Another drink?” thought Jennie.  “It’s ten in the morning and we’re going to a county fair.”  She knew there’d be beer at the fair and Mark was bringing a six-pack in case no one sold his favorite.

The fair was over an hour away and Jennie had to drive.  It was hot, the air conditioner was broken, and they couldn’t afford to fix it.  “We never have any money,” thought Jennie.  Mark was working at the car wash and she was picking up extra shifts at the hardware store.

The car was quiet.  The baby was asleep and they hadn’t really talked for weeks.  Jennie noticed Mark’s hip flask peeking out of his back pocket.  “Jeezus,” thought Jennie, “who needs that at a fair?”

“Welcome to the 1988 Coconino County Fair,” the banner read.

“I want to take Annie to see the animals,” said Jennie.  “Maybe that’ll quiet her.”  Annie had been crying the last half hour.  “I want to see the Midway,” Mark responded.  Mark won, as usual.

They quarreled all the along the Midway -- this attraction was too expensive, that one too boring.  At the end stood a simple tent, with a sign out front.
Fortunes Retold
See the Life-Changing Hourglass
Only $5

“I’m going in,” Mark announced.  “It’s only five bucks and I haven’t tried anything.”  He ducked inside before Jennie could object.  There was an old man, sitting at a table, smoking a cigarette and reading the newspaper.  “What do I get for my money?” asked Mark.

“Tell me your problems and if you’re lucky, the hourglass will let you change them.  I keep the money either way.”

“I’m a drunk and a screw-up,” said Mark, “and I’m taking a good woman down.  Nothing can fix that.  I don’t care about the past, I need a new future.  Everyone’s got problems – what’re yours?”

No one had asked the Keeper about his life before.  “Well,” he began, “I’m the Keeper of the hourglass, and I move from town to town and see if it will help people.”

“Sounds like fun,” said Mark.

The Keeper brought out the hourglass and turned it over.  Down and down ran the blue sand.  Finally, it reached the end.  Slowly, it started to flow upwards.  When it reached the top, both Mark and the Keeper disappeared, but Mark reappeared on the Keeper’s side of the table.

When the next person entered the tent, Mark took her money, and said “Tell me your problems.”

Outside, Jennie left to see the animals.  Much later, when she couldn’t find Mark, she started to worry.  She went back to the tent, but it was gone.  Even though the Sheriff was called, Mark was never found.  In due course, a court granted Jennie a divorce on the basis of abandonment, and her life went on.
* * * * * * * * * *
Mark paid his bill at the motel.  He’d only been in Kansas a week.  Maybe I’ll head north.

Out at the tent, Mark found a middle-aged woman waiting for him.  I’ve got time for one last customer.

Once at the table, Mark began.  “Tell me your troubles.”

“My life’s a mess,” she said.  “I hate my husband and my daughter can’t stand me.  It’s my third marriage, and I don’t think I’m cut out for it.  I just want a better future.  What’s it like for you?”

No one had ever asked Mark about his life before.  “Well, I’m always travelling, taking the hourglass to see if it will help people.”

“Always by yourself?” said the woman.  “Sounds wonderful to me.”

Mark put the hourglass on the table and the sand slowly ran down.  Once it finished, it reversed and when the sand reached the top, both Mark and the woman disappeared.  The woman reappeared on the other side of the table, ready for the next client.

Once again, Mark was at the fair, outside the tent.  Jennie and the baby were next to him.  “I want to see the hourglass,” he said to Jennie.

“Five dollars is too much!  We can’t afford some phony fortune teller.”

Mark stood there, one hand on his wallet, wondering what he should do.  He looked over at Jennie and the baby.  “I want to do this,” he said before entering the tent.  Jennie waited a few minutes, then took the baby to see the animals.  She never saw her husband again.

Jennie didn’t look that hard for Mark.  As soon as she could, she filed for divorce and headed off to a new life, free to leave Arizona behind for a better future.

# # # # # # # # # #

Date: 2017-03-10 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bleodswean.livejournal.com
Oh! Oh. :( You really, really surprised me with this ending. And maybe it's the rain outside or the cold inside, but this was so freakin' SAD. You really set the scene well. Mark is absolutely crystal clear and had me both pulling for him and pushing against him. But I did NOT want that ending for him, at all. THAT CHOICE!!! Wow, G. You really wove a sticky web with this one and I'm going to be mulling it over for a long time.

Blue Hour = sapphire hourglass = brill

Date: 2017-03-10 06:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Mulling is good. I wanted a couple of things left ambiguous. One was the identity of the woman who replaced Mark -- it is possible to read it as being Jennie (middle-aged woman, history of divorce, daughter, Jennie left Arizona) or not. Also, the motives behind Mark's decision at the end. When people get sent back, do they have knowledge of what their life has been like and what the better choice would be, or do people make the same mistakes, or are our lives preordained in some way?. Was Mark's decision an act of sacrifice? He knows that he's a drunk and a screw-up who's no good for Jennie, so it is better for her if he becomes a Keeper. Or, despite how miserable his life as a Keeper has been, it would still be better than any life with Jennie. Mostly, I just wanted to write a story around an hourglass with blue sand and I couldn't come up with anything fun.

Date: 2017-03-10 06:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-17bingo.livejournal.com
But where did he go? Where do any of them go? I'm pretty sure it's to an alternate universe where they didn't make the mistake that's really nagging at them.

Good piece, as always.

Date: 2017-03-10 07:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
I'm glad you enjoyed it. The basic idea was that the hourglass sent them back to a point in their own timeline, presenting them with the opportunity to make a different decision, although alternate universe is an excellent idea. I didn't want to get into the parallel universe/changing history, etc., tangles of time travel, because there just isn't enough space to handle all the ramifications. So basically, the lucky ones get sent back to try again, and the universe of unwritten stories takes care of the rest.

Date: 2017-03-11 06:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tonithegreat.livejournal.com
This was so excellent! I love the similarity between the last woman who switches places with Mark and the woman he leaves behind. A sad story, but fresh where it might have been trope-y.

Date: 2017-03-11 02:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thank you! The similarity between the two women was to bring up the possibility that Jennie and the second woman are the same -- that Jennie's life after Mark wasn't happy and that she found her way to the hourglass and became the next Keeper. Under this possibility, she wouldn't recognize him because it had been 30 years and he wouldn't have recognized her because his earlier life was wiped from his memory when he became Keeper. I wanted to leave this ambiguous, and just have the next Keeper be an echo of Jennie.

Date: 2017-03-11 08:07 am (UTC)
meridian_rose: pen on letter background  with text  saying 'writer' (writer)
From: [personal profile] meridian_rose
This is excellent. I'd go with the sent to a parallel earth if that's where things play out better for them, if they've chosen the right issue that a different choice would make such an impact. I like the inflation rate that makes the fortune telling more expensive over the years it was a nice touch.
The end...I think he'd been given a second chance. If he'd gone with Jennie to see the animals instead of back inside things would have been better? But he didn't seem to learn and maybe he got a different universe or maybe just got erased, having been an Keeper and not grown from that experience?
Fantastic :)

Date: 2017-03-11 02:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
I'm glad you enjoyed it. I like your view of it. Are the people sent back with knowledge of what their lives became, and so can make a better choice, or is it just a rewind, letting the people choose again and hoping they make the right choice? The hourglass doesn't send everyone back -- a dividing line could be that the ones sent back can/will make the better choice, while those not sent back would just make the same bad decision.

Date: 2017-03-13 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] halfshellvenus.livejournal.com
I'm so glad you went with this idea. It was a really unique one, and I liked the vividness of Mark's family scenes and of the old man who was the previous Keeper.

How sad that he repeated his choice again when he went back in time (is he caught in a loop now?), but with his drinking and seeming to put himself before his family, he had made all of the troubles on his own. He didn't seem to have an awareness of returning back to that moment, so he didn't realize what that choice would cost him-- the second time he made it.

Which is kind of neat, really, and maybe should be expected.

Date: 2017-03-13 02:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
I'm glad you liked it. One way of looking at it is that after about 30 years of listening to other people's problems, Mark developed some self-awareness and realized how bad he was for Jennie, and that she would be better off without him, so becoming the Keeper again was an act of self-sacrifice. An alternative, which is less kind to Mark, is that he didn't learn anything and simply makes the same mistake again, which he will continue to do until he gets it right. The dividing line between those who get sent back and those who don't could be that ones who get back have learned from their mistake and, if given a second chance, will make the right decision. The ones who don't get sent back haven't learned enough from their lives to make the right decision.

Date: 2017-03-13 10:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] murielle.livejournal.com
This is truly wonderful, [livejournal.com profile] rayaso. It speaks to the wish in all of us, but it's so much more. Here is Mark, the Everyman, trapped forever on the wheel of bad choices, going around and around and around. (Did you base it on the Tarot?) I wonder if any of the "lucky" ones made the better choice, or if we are all doomed to live our mistakes over and over? Is this a "fresh hell"?

Deep, man! Really good!
Edited Date: 2017-03-13 10:34 am (UTC)

Date: 2017-03-13 02:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
I'm glad you liked it! I didn't have Tarot in mind. I just wanted to set up a situation where people would be given a second chance, but leaving it open as to whether they would make the right one.

Date: 2017-03-14 03:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mamas-minion.livejournal.com
Yikes, he gets a second chance and takes the same route. But I guess he was unaware of what happened and simply repeated the mistake. I wonder how many others did the same thing. Well told and very inventive idea for a story!

Date: 2017-03-14 12:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thanks! Just because you're given a second chance doesn't mean you'll necessarily make the right decision the second time around. Sometimes people don't learn!

Date: 2017-03-14 08:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eternal-ot.livejournal.com
Haha...I liked the fact that you looped it back. Some people don't learn, do they? This was an excellent take once again. I really liked the concept! Kudos.

Date: 2017-03-14 12:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thank you! You're right -- some people just make bad decisions, like moths to flames.

Date: 2017-03-14 06:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] penpusher.livejournal.com
An endless loop of intrigue.

Date: 2017-03-14 08:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Perhaps, at some point, Mark will get it right! Thanks for commenting.

Date: 2017-03-14 09:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] furzicle.livejournal.com
I enjoyed this on the first reading. Now I'm going to have to read it again. Very creative thinking. Thaks for a detour into an interesting alternative world.

Date: 2017-03-14 10:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thank you! Re-reading is quite a compliment, especially given the number of entries.

Date: 2017-03-14 10:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xlovebecomesher.livejournal.com
Fascinating! I love your take on this!

Date: 2017-03-14 10:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Date: 2017-03-15 12:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] roina-arwen.livejournal.com
Very cool premise!

Date: 2017-03-15 12:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rayaso.livejournal.com
Thank you!
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